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Planning - Fail to Plan and Plan To Fail

31/7/2014

 
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From the day  I saw this message hanging above the counter in my Credit Union Bank in Canada, " Fail to Plan - Plan to Fail" has stuck with me. That saying carries a very important message. If you want to get somewhere you have to say where it is you will go or what you want and make a plan on how to get there.


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How to Deal With Critcism

14/7/2014

 
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Is what you are hearing criticism or is it just information, so called feedback? Our daily lives, job, home and relationships are full of criticism, judgements,feedback and evaluations. And even if you think you don't do it, you do. And you likely do it more often than you think.

Your partner tells you do something this way or that way. Or you tell them, "You did this wrong and didn't finish that properly. You could have done that better by using this method, etc." Was the task really important? Does it really matter if it was done this way or that way? Would you rather be right or be happy? Well---?

Quite often folks think they are being helpful by making suggestions for change or improvements and sometimes they are. Often you may interpret that as unecessary criticism or judgement of  who you are when often it is not, it is information that you sometimes need to know and understand. At the end of the day, it is not necessary to agree but it is critically important to understand and accept their opinions and feelings as valid for them. 


When you write a report or e-mail maybe the same person often gives you feedback about where you can make improvements to something that is seemingly insignificant. People make spontaneous suggestions about the colour of a shirt or blouse that would go better with your jacket. Or you misinterpret information in a discussion as criticism or denial of what you said. Conversation is a dialogue which means every person has a meaning. Listen and understand them as them, not a denial of you. What was their intention? How do you know? Maybe you do not and must ask so you have the right information. Do not react or interpret. Stop, Look and Listen!

Feedback/criticism is a part of life. We need it to function and to communicate. What do we get from it, information, a swollen head or a wounded heart?


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    Authors

    Bob and Marianne own SteppingStoneLifeCoaching.
    Marianne, a Norwegian, is a Certified Life Coach, former Conflict Resolution Counsellor. She has also studied five years at the University of Stavanger.

    Bob has over 12 years experience as a life coach, career and business counsellor. Bob also worked for some years as a strategic policy analyst. He has a Masters in Public Administration and also worked as Business Consulting Services Manager in Canada. 

    Please note that all the written material in this blog is Copyright, but can be used or quoted if the source   www.steppingstonelifecoaching.com is quoted. Concerns or questions, contact us please. 
    And please leave a comment, we would love to understand you a bit better.

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