From the day I saw this message hanging above the counter in my Credit Union Bank in Canada, " Fail to Plan - Plan to Fail" has stuck with me. That saying carries a very important message. If you want to get somewhere you have to say where it is you will go or what you want and make a plan on how to get there.
So many choices so little time. Too much indecision leads to fewer possibilities as time goes by. What does it all mean? What is the key to making changes in your life?
There are three key things we all can do to change to the lives we want and value. Simply stated,there are three steps. First you must mindfully accept where you are at. Second, you must decide where you want to go and visualize it. Third, you must act. Starting has amazing power and leads to the next step, and the next and so on. That is called Success!
Now, let´s take a closer look at each of the three steps.
To accept where you are at mentally, physically, socially and financially is the true starting point for all successful journeys of change. You must do this. For example, if I argue with my partner every day, I must see the situation for what it is. I won't make any progress if I deny it. This is not about judging or criticizing myself. It is about having the right information to make a decision from. To be mindfull and accept your reality is power information not weakness.
Once you accept where you are you have the information you need to decide where you want to be. So when I say to myself that I often argue with my partner; that is where I am. Where do I want to be? I decide that I want a life where my partner and I are happy, we communicate peacefully and have found the love again. That is my goal.
How can I get that happier and better relationship with my partner? I see that I can get help from a life coach or marriage counselor, I can read a book, speak with a friend or take a Relationship Skills course. Maybe I will do all four; where will I start. "I know! I will speak with Paul and read that marriage book. Then I will speak with my partner and we can take that Relationship/Marriage Skills course. Afterwards we can get some coaching."
Last step. Take action, start moving. So I will phone Paul and go over and speak with him. On the way over to Paul´s house I will buy the book. Before I go over to Paul´s I will make an appoinment with my wife to talk about things, us. I will ask her to enroll in the course with me.
Best of luck to all of you who want to make life changes. The process is the same no matter what you want to change.®
Get started now, and take action. Live, Love and be Happy, Marianne and Bob
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From time to time it is so wonderful to inject a little romance into our often routine lives. The most obvious time for this is the weekend as most of us work. It takes just a little planning, time and usually very little money.
Be creative, thoughtful and have no expectations. Let yourself be surprised by the results you create.
Tip # 1. The morning magic moment. Could be the evening magic moment also, but not on Friday evening. At least one of you is tired and that is a romance killer. Also, have a plan to deal with the kids for a few hours or an evening at grandma's house. Have a good friend take the kids for a few hours and return the favour at a later time. Plan a little and have fun with it. Planning is fun, yes?
When the house and kitchen is a mess that is a definite distraction from romantic ideas. So maybe spring out of bed early, tidy the kitchen, take out your secret bottle of chilled champagne and blend 50-50 with orange juice (heavenly delicious). Serve it on a nicely decorated tray or plate. Visualize a romantic setting and create a little ambiance with a few candles, some romantic music. (see our music list from February 12, 2013)
Wrap up 3 chocolates and create a little handwritten note that you will attach to the Romantic Gift. Suggested wording could be "To the world's most wonderful, beautiful wife or husband. I love you. Especially when you......"
Now deliver the goods. Do they like the idea of champagne in bed? Or served at a decorated table.
Tip # 2. Super magic moment.
This is an enhanced version of Tip # 1. Deliver a note with the gift and a glass of orange juice champagne to your partner´s bed. Be a little creative with the note because when you deliver the goods it will be at another location in the house. For example, if you have a bath tub or hot tub, make a good bubble bath for them and set the rest of the champagne bottle in the bathroom. Of course a few candles is romantic and music where possible. Maybe you can pose as the waiter. With a hand towel over your arm.
Or the other location could be at a nicely set table in the kitchen complete with champagne, a lovely "cooked by you"-breakfast, with the hand towel over the arm! Remember to change your note and invite them to the right place not to the garage or the neighbours! Have fun.
Tip # 3 Get Dressed Up and Be Somebody
How about planning a dynamite homecooked meal. You can serve it with a bottle of good wine, candles , romantic music. To make it real special. Send them a written invitation saying that the dress code is "dressed up" . Men, have a shower and shave and use a little quality men's perfume. This is a quality person you will dine with. Most of all, unload the children for overnight if possible. Enjoy the meal and take a trip back to the good old days when you were in love.
Be romantic , live long and happy, Bob and Marianne.®
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I am 5 feet 3 inches tall, (158 cm). When I was young I played and won many basketball games in my mother's back yard by making key turn-around jumpshots, fades and foul shots at the last moment of the game and mostly I never missed.
On those occasions when a shot did not physically go in I changed the story and charged ahead. By changing my story I won for my self and my team. I was filled up with glowing warmth and strength. I had the experience of winning by making a new story, shooting, driving, passing, hooking, fading jump shots. I could hear the crowd and feel the handclaps of my teammates on my shoulders. It was so cool. I felt it and it was good, it was fun!
I guess that most of us have lived some fantasies as sports heros, actresses, keynote speakers, warriors, nurses, doctors etc. We did it and it was called play. Lets pretend. It seems that we "grow up" and stop acting out or practicing our fantasies. Suddenly life seems to change. Some people feel we lose this skill of imagining or visualizing and practising in such incredible detail that it seems and feels real. I don't really think so.
Do you know what? I don't know about you, but I quit practicing. There were "serious things that had to be done" and time was of the essence. The problem was I launched out without a dream and just took a good job without a vision of my possible life story.
But here is the thing. Are you really happy about your present life story? What if you decided to change your existing story that you are not happy about? What if you decided to change it to a new happy success story? What would it look like? Feel like? Can you hear the sounds of doing it intensely, becoming great at it, so great it is real? Sound, texture, smell, feel and movement. Can you imagine what you must do,whom you must speak with, what you must learn and practice to get there? Get some life coaching to help you to visualize and create a new life story.
Think new life story and get into it! Just like this.
Wow! I am standing at the annual Pulitzer Prize Award meeting about to give my acceptance and thank you speech for the Pulitzer Prize for the book I wrote which has sold 5,500,000 copies and is making a difference in peoples' lives!
The place is packed with people all dressed up for the occasion. I can hear the low buzz of people, feel the crackling of the energy. And then I hear the voice of the master of ceremonies, Oprah, over the sound system. " Ladies and gentlemen (pause and I can feel my heart beat faster and my mouth is dry!), it gives me great pleasure to announce the winner of this years Pulitzer (Pause - stillness and ) Robert Tewsley, for his best selling book - "Getting the World you Want Before They Take it Away". Thunderous applause as I stand up suddenly and walk over to the podium.®
Dream big, take action and practice wildly, love and light, Bob and Marianne.
Now I Visualize you "Liking Us" or Twittering us below, and do it , thanks.
Bob and Marianne own SteppingStoneLifeCoaching.